A Public Event

For a long time I have privately chronicled my thoughts and intellectual developments. I even went so far for a few years to keep a secret online blog, mostly filled with personal drama that reflected the self-indulgent height of my moral maturity. It contained, amongst the many tails of silliness and other trivial squabbles that teenage girls are prone to focus on, several choice entries of real, serious philosophical inquiry that showed a glimpse of the larger context upon which my thoughts were often focused at that time.

But when a server crash erased over a year's worth of unbacked entries, I was completely devasted by the loss of so much mental production. I swore off journals, blogs and writing as a whole.

Over the last year, however, as I have made a serious commitment to examining and living the virtues of an Evolutionary Enlightment (EE) teaching, I have found myself spending countless hours composing in my mind my observations and corresponding but ever changing conclusions about health, spirtuality and moral obligations. This teaching, and the time I have spent contemplating its implications has by far and large revolutionized my work as an acupuncturist and practitioner of Chinese Medicine (CM). I have received most flattering praise and positive feedback about my skills in the treatment room which I attribute 90% of to the learnings and practice of the EE teachings introduced into my life three years ago by my teacher - a leading edge scholar of CM and the spiritual practice of medicine.

But while I have been eagerly applying this newfound knowledge and understanding of CM to the treatment room, I have continued to shy away from producing any written works of substance on the matter. I could lie to myself and others by saying that it all stems from the trauma of losing so much of my previous amateur work. But in my increasing wisdom and ability to view my actions in a more honest light, I know this is simply an excuse of the ego. The real reason being a fear of judgement - the ego always wants to look good - and fear of making a mistake - as that which I observe and write today should (if I am really seriously engaging at the edge of postmodern consciousness) appear to be naive and foolish in a year, two years, ten years time as my understanding and thus wisdom deepens.

But no one wants to appear naive or foolish - not in a public realm, right? So why I have I committed to beginning a new, fully public blog in which to record and share my observations?

The answer lies in the New Year's Address for 2010 published and discussed in a live webcast today by Andrew Cohen. The address was entitled: "Making a Statement" and what struck me was Andrew's assertion:

"... [I]f you are the highest expression, as far as we know, of the leading edge of the entire evolutionary unfolding, then what you do is always a reflection of the process itself. The way in which you engage with the world is a statement about how you see and understand the process that gave life to you. The expression of your own humanity—your greater or lesser degree of inspired moral development, higher virtue, and spiritual enlightenment—is an expression of what the leading edge of the process actually is. Your life—the life you are living right now—is a public event, an evolutionary event, an event that says something significant about Life itself. The way you are, as an individual, is your personal contribution to what evolution looks like here and now."

... Your life is a public event ...

Let that soak in a bit. A PUBLIC event.

Even if we'd like to believe we are living in private; even if our focus is so narrow sighted that we cannot see beyond our own private world of personal events, that which we think, say, and do on a daily basis - every moment - is a reflection, a declaration of what life is in and of itself. We define life and reality by our choices. We define humanity by our actions. Even when no one else is looking, we are creating a statement about what it means to be living a human life.

And that statement can never be anything but public because it creates reality and reality te public sphere in which all human beings exist and interact.

Andrew went on to say: "So when you begin to recognize that your own presence here in this world is part of something infinitely bigger than yourself, you feel a sense of obligation awakening within you—a spiritually inspired obligation to be the very best you can be for the sake of the process itself."

I'm not sure yet what "the very best I can be" looks like - it's a concept I've been really struggling to grasp for the last year now - since the time that my teacher called me to step up to the plate and decide "what I really want to do". I knew the answer the moment he asked me the question, but the immediate questions that followed in my mind - how do I do it; how can I do it; who am I to have such great aspirations for mankind and who am I to believe I could actually accomplish any of them - these still remain unanswered as I face my own overwhelming self-doubt complicated by equally narcissistic pride.

But without the final answer, I do feel as though I have a good idea where to start - and that start begins with writing and sharing my thoughts and experiences with CM and EE in a public way that serves to benefit and inspire others - at the risk of my ego looking less than perfect from time to time (or most of the time).

So with that I begin this blog and publish my first entry. May 2010 be a year of great cultivation and evolution for all.